Wit And Writ: China HK 2007: Kunming, Yunnan Province

Wow, what can be said about Kunming that hasn't already been jotted down by Wikipedia?

Okay, where is it, you ask? Well, it's somewhere in the middle of China, and not quite near Tibet nor too low towards Beijing. Think, flyover-state, like a combination of Kansas, Tennessee and Nebraska. Believe me, it's on the map.

Anyhow, I'm gonna let the pics do the talking for awhile:

The view from our hotel room -- kinda like the skyline in Dallas.

We stayed right across from this giant convention center --
that no one seems to be using. It's 6 times larger than the
Staple Center, and just waiting to be filled, with, well, anybody.

This is the entrance to some caves we saw. It was kinda
like going to Yosemite -- if they turned it into an
amusement park.

Here are 4 female tour guides and their pimp. As you can
see, he means business.

This cave would stretch into the mountain a few miles or so.

We went into this thing called the Lion's Cave, 'cause the
rock in front of you looks like a Lion -- doesn't it?

They transformed the entire cave into a gift shop/kiosk.
Come for the beauty, stay for the knick-knacks.

And if you're lucky, you can buy...

Funny looking cigarette holders! Woo-Hoo!

With even more walking, the caves ended up looking a lot
like this:

Stalactites and stalagmites bathed in multi-colored lights.
As if Walt Disney stopped by and consulted on the deco.

Check it out! Can you see the sign in the bottom right corner?
And you thought the "Dark Knight" lived in Gotham City!

I'm not gonna lie. Everyone posed in front of this thing and
I didn't want to feel left out. Oh, the peer pressure!

This was the last 3 flights of stairs we needed to walk up
in order to get out of the caves. Although there were guys
lined up with sedans (basically, carrying your ass out) at the
bottom, most of us sucked it up and hit the pavement, er,
bamboo steps. I even helped out an old lady that was on
the tour with us. And I'm happy to report, she made it
through all 20 flights.

On the way back, we got to ride this ski lift back to the top
of the hill where our bus was (we will end up doing this
a lot at the other sights we go to).

Good thing I'm not afraid of heights -- much.

And the view was totally worth it.

As we were heading back, I saw that sign in the right hand
corner. It seems they're more worried about you dropping
garbage on the ground than YOU dropping on the ground.
Then again, it's a bitch to get the custodians down there!

Next Up: The Stone Forest

Literally made up of stones across a few acres, this place
TOTALLY ROCKED!

Check it out. Doesn't that rock look like a... here's a hint: it
goes "oink".

Now this was pretty cool. The guy is proposing to the girl
in one of the locals' ceremonies. The girl is supposed to refuse
a few times, so the guy has to keep pleading until she caves.
And with much persistence, she finally said yes, but not before
rushing into the bushes with the young man chasing after her.
Seriously, this part I am not making up. The happy couple
literally rode into the sunset -- their cars were parked a few
feet away.

I know, without the stones, it looks like the back 9 at Augusta.
However, it'd only be half true. The grass is actually, from
America -- imported Kentucky Bluegrass. Seriously,
I can't make this stuff up.