Oh, Canada! - The Vacation 2006, Part 3: Niagara, We Almost Missed Ya...

Although I had been to Niagara Falls many, many, many years ago, my father and I thought heck, why not, right? I was there, it was there, it all seemed to work out for the best. Anything for an excuse to go out for a drive on the Canadian highways...

As you can see, the early morning wake-up did not agree with me. Good thing the camera was set to "Morning Stun" and not "Thunder-wake Kill".

The drive there was pretty uneventful. Since I am not quite as chipper in the morning, and, well, let's face, I was barely awake, my father did the first leg of the drive while I played navigator/manning-the-radio-CD-player operator. Since Dane Cook seemed to work out so well on the drive from London, I popped in another CD of his, reclined my chair back and cranked it up. My father was laughing in no time, while I, the ever vigilant traveler, fell asleep with the map sprawled on my lap. I swear my finger was at least pointing toward the direction of Niagara.

My father ever so gently slapped me awake for breakfast about an hour later. We stopped off at this hole-in-the-wall diner that served bacon with everything - it was not the kind of place that would be weird if you asked for "Bacon with a side of Bacon," or "Bacon with a side of Peameal", but it would feel strange if you asked them to "hold" the bacon. So, when in Rome, huh? We clutched our chests with every bite...

After raising our cholesterol a few points, we headed back on the road. Having 4 cups of coffee is enough of a jumpstart for me, so I passed over the map to my dad, and I took the reigns for the rest of the drive to the falls.

Things were going according to plan... that is, until we actually got there. You see, back when the city was smaller, and there wasn't the casino, and no TGI-Friday clones to populate the main St. area, one could easily see where the falls were and drive toward them. With the big buildings blocking the luscious falls from view, one either knew how to get there, or one would get lost. Guess which bunch we were?

We discovered later that I had missed a crucial left turn that would have taken us right to the falls and where all the parking was. Instead, we just kept driving straight, going farther and farther away from the falls. However, to justify our loss in sense of direction, we decided that the "detour" around the falls was welcome. Therefore, the town of Chipawa was very charming; the country-club golf course looked very grand and gave just enough bourgoise character to the place without seeming overly pompous.

Many expletives shouted between my father and I later - as to who got who lost, we were struck by the awe and beauty of the falls, though mostly awed at the fact that we hadn't accidentally crossed back into New York. We were getting closer at least...

These were taken along the route "to" the falls. The first pic is the power generating turbines, which are positioned so that as the water runs past, well, the rest is self-explanatory. The second is aimed toward the horizon of the falls. So, are we there yet? Almost!

We went into the Casino first. I don't know what it is about the Canadian security, but they really couldn't believe I was over 21. They kept scrutinizing my Passport - I almost expected a CSI team to pop out to forensically scan my papers and check my DNA or something. Several frustrated minutes later, they gave up their search and let me in. In case you're wondering, we broke even on the Slots after we lost everything in the cup I'm holding.

We're getting warmer...

Ah, the Hershey Store. Anything and everything was related to the chocolate. Naturally, this store had the coldest AC of all.

Now, if the Hershey Store could only sell him, I'd buy one. Nothing like having a giant Hershey Kiss in your backyard as a conversation starter.

I thought it was funny that when I took this pic, some stranger yelled at me "f--king tourist", as he was getting back into his "Niagara Falls Tour" van. Yeah, way to go, pot calling the kettle black... But who can resist taking a pic of a Canadian Mountie statue? Not me!

All right, without further ado, I give you... NIAGARA FALLS!

Okay, okay, it's a little obstructed. How about this?

That's better, right?

Those are the falls where you can take a boat down and ride behind the waterfall.
I hear it's real neat, so I guess I'll do that next time!

This was the only shot I could get with both falls in the same picture.
See! I'm not the only crazy person taking a bajillion pictures of Niagara!

And just to show I was there. Ah, the mist was refreshing!

Since we had gotten there so early, we left in the afternoon to head back
into Toronto to do some more chillin'...

TO BE CONTINUED!